I just can’t help but feel some pity for someone I saw on the news days ago. He killed himself for having some troubles with his girlfriend. A friend who was watching with me at that time laughed and said that he’s crazy, for how could he kill himself just for having a broken heart?
Some people may react different ways about the idea of having a broken heart because of failed relationships. At most, especially if you are not the one suffering from it, you may think that the broken hearted’s feelings will just go away in just a click. Some people may feel so depressed and may even result to self-directed hatred and worst of all, suicide.
In reality, no matter how we react to it, having a broken heart can be devastating. It can rob you off your self worth and you could find yourself struggling so hard that you may fail to live normally like you used to.
Let’s face the fact that a failed relationship wherein we have to lose someone is like dealing with death and dying. Not every one of us is equipped with so much ability to adjust and bounce back like nothing had happened. Aside from that, as long as we keep a relationship, we invest on our emotions and time for the one we love. We sacrifice many things just to be with him or even cope with his expectations and demands just to find ourselves in the middle of nowhere when the relationship dies.
Truly, broken hearts can also mean broken dreams and broken promises. As soon as we lose the one we love, we have to face life without him. Here are a few ways to mend a broken heart and somehow ease the pain.
- On the first day after the break up and within a week:
2. Call a trusted friend to talk to. Talk all about your hurts and how you feel. Pour out all the emotions that are inside you. You can ask your friend to be with you to watch some movie, or watch a marathon of any TV series that enables you to keep off your mind from thinking too much. You can choose from comedy, to movies that may make you cry. Surprising as it may seem, but watching some sad movies during a hard time may also help in the healing process.
3. Accept the reality that a relationship that you thought would last did not work out. And appreciate the fact that although you are now heart broken, for once in your life, you fell in love. It does not necessarily mean that once you have accepted this fact, you are healed from a broken heart. Acknowledge how the pain is hurting you so bad at the moment.
4. Pray as much as you need to and as long as you feel like doing it. No matter where you are, if you feel the urge to pray, pray from the heart. Cry out loud in prayer that you can make it through the grieving process.
- After a week:
2. Express how you feel through your journal or as always, talk to a trusted friend or love one.
3. Go out of town to change your environment. This will minimize you from missing your ex. Staying on the same place and having a chance to pass by a place where you both used to spend time together may cause you to miss him even more. Your working place or school may also be one of the places where you think of him all the more for it is where he fetches you or where you meet everyday.
4. Listen to relaxing music or even to love songs. Some may make you cry but after that, you may feel better.
5. Do a hobby that you have been longing to spend more time on.
6. Call your ex if you feel like calling him, but if fighting with him is a possibility, DON’T CALL AT ALL. If you need to tell him some things but are not sure if it will only cause a fight, try writing it on your journal or compose a letter for him but NEVER mail it. The most vital thing at this moment is that you can bring out all your feelings and say all sorts of hurtful words that you long to say whether he will know them or not.
7. Remove everything that he has given you like love letters or any keepsakes from your sight. You can throw or burn them or just give away the keepsakes. However, if you don’t feel like doing this, just keep them away from your sight so that you will not be tempted to look at them over and over again and you won’t be reminded of your ex often.
- …. And onwards:
2. Never stop surrounding your self with people and friends that emphasize the positive in your life.
3. Start pampering your self, exercise, and start a balanced diet. This will not only boost the production of your feel-good hormones which are helpful in keeping the blues away, but it will also make you look better as you reach your ideal weight. On the other hand, a balanced diet will also help you have better-looking skin and a better mood.
4. Take time to relax. Do a beauty makeover if you wish. The internet is packed up on DIY for self care that can be easily done at home.
5. Start going on a date when you feel like it.
6. Socialize in a positive way – never drink alcohol or use drugs to “forget”. At this time of quarantine, socialize via the social media. Keep in mind to edit the settings so that your news feed will just be from people who give positive vibes in your life.
7. Surround yourself with people who help you to forget your ex and keep away from people who give you false hope about winning your ex back.
8. Learn ways to keep yourself from remembering your ex. Every time he/ she enters your mind, divert your thoughts to other things.
Always remember that people change. And if some people suddenly realize that you no longer serve the purpose you once had in their life, it does not mean that you are a lesser person. It just means that people change, people grow... and you will do the same. Someday, you will realize that the broken heart you have right now have made you a better person. Someday, God will bless you with someone who can love you forever, HE will bless you at HIS MOST PERFECT PLACE AND TIME... and you will just laugh at your self for crying like a baby in the past. But while you wait, BE STRONG and LOVE YOUR SELF... KNOW THAT YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL INSIDE AND OUT, AND YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY AGAIN.
Let a broken heart bring out the best you got...
